FRIENDS?

This is a question not many guys like answering after or during a breakup. If the answer is yes from a guy, then the guy has some flicker of hope that someday the embers of friendship will be given breath and rekindle to the flame of love it was…… or better. I don’t know what ladies or men understand exactly when they break up but one thing am sure of is that we don’t all understand it the same way. Ladies believe its elevation to friendship but men see it as relegation to just a common person. Way below what any man expects of a lady.

This goes against everything I believe in, but it takes a real man to stay and make the friendship work. That’s the very abnormal me speaking but sad it’s only right that you stay as friends. Love has no rules but this is an unwritten one. You can never be ‘just’ friends with someone you love. Don’t test whether he is a gentleman enough to stick around after you kick him to the curb. Life is too short to do trial and error. As they say you will find that you have been picking rocks as everybody picked the jewels that you made ‘just’ friends.

The whole point of breaking up is not to be enemies exactly but to change how you look at the relationship you had. After being lovers the only next thing you can be is strangers or best friends. Ladies had better get that through their heads or they will only break their own hearts by expecting too much from lover turned stranger. It will never be the same so don’t even try making the break up sound any better by trying to be ‘just’ friends with a guy who gave you his heart. It only makes it worse.

Don’t get it twisted though. Some guys will take advantage of being strangers to follow their vendetta. Revenge is sweet but remember this is someone you love or loved depending on what you shared. As a gentleman, it’s only fair if you walk away before you break what is left of your heart.

Funny when she becomes the person you meet in every turn you make. Not that you follow each other but I believe hearts have a way to find each other. Talk of being soul mates. Occasionally say hi. It is plain rude to pretend like you don’t know her even though you are familiar ‘strangers’.

Being a gentleman is some piece of work. It only takes men with the right cojones to give up their interests and think of the people around them however bad they hurt them or otherwise. It’s hard but I am only trying to make it as realistic as possible because I know it breeds a lot of uncertainty. Is it too hard not to take advantage of your power or of the weakness of those around you?